Hey everyone and welcome back to Serenity in The Spirit!
I assume for most of you, the last time you were here was back in August when I posted 4 Verses for a New Season, a post which I pray helped many of you especially if you were beginning a new season like me. I have now been in my new job for 3 months and I love it! It’s kept me busy and I’m really enjoying the projects I’m working on - God is so good, I nearly never even turned up for the assessment centre, I only went for the experience!
Not only that, but in case you didn’t already know, I recently got engaged and so since September, wedding planning has also kept me busy. God has blessed me with more than I could have even imagined for myself at this stage of my life and I am, of course, extremely grateful but can I be honest? Since around about the time of my last post I have felt like I stood still spiritually. At this massively exciting time in my life, where God has been doing so much, I have just felt spiritually stagnant. The expectation, for times like this, would be that I would be on fire for God. That I would be growing spiritually from strength to strength after seeing what God is doing for me and where He is taking me but the complete truth is, for 2-3 months I have not read my bible every day. I have not made the effort to pray Spirit-led prayers every day. I have not made space to hear from God let alone carry out His will in all things. Ultimately, I placed other people and things above Him and settled for the bare minimum.
Whilst I was feeling like this, I’m not saying I stopped doing any ‘Christian things’ or I stopped believing in God all together. My identity didn’t change and I suspect many people didn’t notice much change in me but I knew within myself that I wasn’t feeling 100% and I knew the enemy was trying to hold me down and, in some areas, I was kind of letting him. The enemy will always try to attack us when He knows we are about to make a big breakthrough, God has really blessed me and the devil does not want God to get the glory.
In recent months, I have found myself in a position where I would hear amazing, solid and biblical preaching but I couldn’t motivate myself to act on it. I would pray at the altar and ask for God’s help but then return to how I was before, feeling extremely unmotivated and unable to change my ways. Reading the Bible was something I ‘rarely had time for’ and praying was reserved for the special 10 minutes before bed where I was basically already falling asleep. Guys, I know I am not the only person who has felt like this, someone reading this right now knows exactly what I am talking about. You know what? We HAVE to do better! Jesus sacrificed His LIFE for us and we can’t even sacrifice a decent amount of time out of our day to give Him praise? What is your average daily screen time? How much time have you spent on Instagram today? I am not saying this from a higher place of studying my bible and praying for hours on end in all my free time - I need to work on this too but I recognise that sometimes we just need a push in the right direction. The purpose of this post is not to shame anybody but to openly admit that as Christians there may be times in our walk where we feel like this. We cannot let the devil win, we must give God the glory He deserves and we mustn’t do it begrudgingly. I will be praying daily for God to give me a heart that desires the things of Him and if you would like to join me, you could try something like this:
Abba Father, thank You for Your grace. Thank You that even when I have not given You the praise You deserve or served You in the way that I should, You have never turned your back on me. Forgive me Father for placing other people and things above You and help me Lord to make You the King of my heart. Transform my mind and heart that I may truly desire the things of You. Let my desires line up with Your will for my life and if they don’t, help me to choose Your way and not my own. I love You Lord and I pray this in the precious name of Jesus, amen.
I am definitely feeling better but I recognise that serving God is not just a life choice, it’s a daily choice, hourly choice, those small minute-by-minute decisions can make a massive difference to your spiritual maturity. Fortunately, the past couple of months when I haven’t been feeling 100% haven’t been a waste of time. As I have quoted many times on this blog before, God’s Word says “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” - Romans 8:28. This time has proven to me that you can not be truly satisfied by anything in this world alone. Not an amazing job, amazing friends, amazing family or even the incredible prospect of marrying your best friend and doing life together. God must be at the centre of it all and the God-shaped hole in all of our hearts can only be filled by God Himself. If you are unsure about how to accept Him into your life or you want to know more about what exactly it means, feel free to message me at anytime on our social media pages below or personally if you are able to. I’ll also happily answer any anonymous questions/comments here.
Jesus really is The Way, The Truth, and The Life, let Him guide you to EVERLASTING life and not the TEMPORARY happiness brought by our sins.
Thank you for reading and sorry for the lack of posts. By God’s grace, I will do better and 2020 will bring God's plans for this platform into fruition - what a wonderful God we serve!
Song of the post: Father's Place - Naje Busia & Friends
*this video is actually 1hr 21mins and is a medley of some beautiful worship songs. If you ever need some background music while doing some work or concentrating on something - this is it!